These past few years have been life-changing, to say the least. I have been on a deeply personal journey to uncover my life’s purpose. I’ve had this yearning in my soul for so long for something more, and ultimately it’s lead me to Reiki.
“What is my purpose?”
I know you’ll understand when I say, It’s a question that I have agonized over since my teenage years. Even in the darkest moments of depression, there was a light in me that flickered, and I became keenly aware that I was here to do something meaningful, something that could help others find their light again.
“But what was it?”
As I got older, got married and had children, I thought I was fulfilling my purpose through motherhood. And although it has given me many gifts, lessons and opportunities to learn about myself on a deeper level, there was always that nagging feeling there was more for me to do and be in the world. The agonizing part was not knowing what I was meant to do/be.
Subsequently, there was lots of inner turmoil in my late thirties as that feeling got stronger, and I could no longer ignore it. I found myself unbalanced, and that caused a lot of stress then add that I was already under the stress of motherhood and meeting the needs of all three of my children, especially my children with Autism.
Our family has spent many years navigating the world of Autism and it has given me profound insight and understanding into the complexities of their world. As a result, I have such a deep connection to each of my children. My husband and I took great pains to make sure that our children’s emotional needs were met, often at the expense of our own immediate needs. Naturally, that allowed stress to accumulate, and for me, the stress became chronic. I didn’t fully recognize the impact of it until my body started letting me know.
The mental, physical and spiritual exhaustion finally caught up to me, and I recognized that I was in the early stages of burnout. Life’s responsibilities became overwhelming, I could not see the forest for the trees some days. I was always tired, unmotivated and didn’t want to think or problem-solve anymore. I knew I needed to regain balance within myself, and my soul’s yearning for something more grew urgent inside me.
I took a step back, and with some help, got my days in order which allowed me to have more time for activities that would give me energy, and I learned to delegate or let go of things that I didn’t want to manage anymore.
One of the things that I started as a form of stress relief was meditation. I had meditated before but found it hard to keep my monkey-mind from wandering. It seemed like a lot of effort. But this time was different, I felt wide-open to it! I noticed immediately a surge in energy and well-being that I had not felt before. It was so beautiful, yet I was a little taken aback because it was so powerful to me. This made me realize that there is a lot more to energy than what we observe with our eyes! My interest in learning about energy and working with energy grew more and more. Then, a friend suggested that I might want to learn Reiki.
I knew nothing about Reiki, but I felt immediately drawn to it (oh the way that crazy energy works!), and quickly found a Reiki Master in town who was teaching the First Degree.
I immediately connected with the Reiki energy, and I assimilated and practiced the teachings. I felt so ready to go deeper into the study, and I continued on to Level 2.
Level 2 has increased my energy connections so much, and I feel such great joy in giving and receiving Reiki. Opening up to Reiki has given me a deeper connection to life itself and has helped me to discover who I am and my place in the world.
I know within the deepest part of me that I have found the purpose I was always searching for. I was meant to share my energy, my journey, and Reiki with others. I feel such a balance in life now that I’m connected to this practice and I am humbled that I found Reiki or that Reiki found me.